Fersch LLC Fersch LLC 2026-05-28T19:17:58Z https://www.pffamilylaw.com/feed/atom/ WordPress /wp-content/uploads/sites/1404572/2023/06/cropped-fl-site-icon-32x32.png On Behalf of Fersch LLC Family Law <![CDATA[Having “right of first refusal” can give you more parenting time]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47592 2025-04-10T14:04:03Z 2025-04-10T14:04:03Z provision in your parenting plan can give you chances for added parenting time if your co-parent would otherwise have to call in a caregiver during their designated parenting time.

How does right of first refusal work?

Typically, this kind of provision states that if a parent needs someone else to care for their child during their scheduled parenting time, they need to reach out to their co-parent before arranging for third-party child care. For example, say your ex has to go into work on a Saturday to deal with a crisis when the child is scheduled to be with them. Before they call a family member or babysitter, they would need to find out if you can take the child for the day.

What specifics should be in the provision?

It helps to include some specifics in the provision. For example:
  • How soon after a parent learns they need a caregiver do they have to notify their co-parent, and by what methods (text, phone call, parenting app, etc?)
  • How much time does the co-parent have to respond?
  • What estimated child care time period requires notifying the co-parent (an hour, an evening, a day)?
  • Is “make-up time” or a swap required, and under what circumstances?
For example, if a parent has to go to an event and their co-parent take the child for the day, do they have to give up a day from “their” time? Typically, this arrangement only works if co-parents live in the same area. It can be used for everything from last minute job schedule changes to planned commitments and for as little as an hour or two to a full day or more. You might think that this kind of provision is unnecessary because you and your co-parent have a good relationship and you assume that you’d always reach out to one another first. However, things change. You may hit rough patches in your co-parenting relationship. You may want to at least be given the opportunity to spend more time with your child regardless of how amicable your co-parenting relationship is or is not as your situation evolves. With sound legal guidance, you can negotiate a right of first refusal provision that helps protect your right to care for your child whenever possible accordingly.]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[Can narcissistic spouses pursue child custody to get revenge?]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47554 2025-03-01T16:46:40Z 2025-03-01T16:46:40Z The narcissistic mindset in custody battles For narcissistic individuals, child custody battles are less about the child’s best interests and more about asserting dominance over their former spouse. They can pursue child custody not out of genuine concern for the child’s well-being but as a means of revenge against their former partner. They may view custody as a tool to:
  • Punish their ex-partner
  • Inflict emotional pain
  • Maintain a sense of superiority
In many cases, narcissistic spouses will weaponize the legal system to prolong the custody battle. Their motivation is knowing that the emotional and financial strain will wear down their ex-partner. Their spouses should expect their narcissistic partners to:
  • Make false allegations
  • Manipulate facts
  • Use the child as a pawn to gain leverage
For example, they might suddenly demand full custody after showing little interest in parenting during the marriage, simply to disrupt their ex-partner’s life.

The impact on children

Children are often the unintended victims in scenarios where a narcissistic partner is using them as pawns to gain leverage. Narcissistic parents may prioritize their own needs over their child’s emotional well-being. The children may feel:
  • Caught in the middle
  • Pressured to take sides
  • Used as messengers between parents
In extreme cases, the narcissistic parent may even attempt to alienate the child from the other parent, a behavior known as parental alienation. While narcissistic spouses can, and sometimes do, pursue child custody as a form of revenge, their spouses should remember that the legal system is designed to protect the best interests of children. By staying informed, documenting concerning behavior and seeking legal support, spouses of narcissists can counter their tactics and advocate for their child’s well-being more effectively.]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[From conflict to cooperation: A guide to co-parenting]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47555 2025-02-10T21:40:22Z 2025-02-10T21:40:22Z find the best approach for your family.

High-conflict parenting

This style involves ongoing disputes and poor communication. This creates a stressful environment, not only for the parents but also for the child. The tension and frequent arguments can lead to emotional distress. Example of high-conflict parenting:
  • The school notifies parents that their child cut class.
  • Instead of discussing the situation together, each parent blames the other.
  • Both parents might take legal action to change custody arrangements.
  • The child faces separate punishments from each parent.
This approach is not child-centered and often makes things worse.

Parallel parenting

This is a more reasonable approach for parents who cannot communicate without conflict but still want to be involved in their child's life. Each parent makes decisions independently during their parenting time, minimizing interaction. Example of parallel parenting:
  • A child gets into trouble at school.
  • The child is with one parent, who enforces one consequence.
  • When the child goes to the other parent’s home, they impose a different punishment.
  • The lack of communication results in the child living in two separate worlds.
While this method reduces conflict, it may not always be in the child’s best interest.

Productive co-parenting

This is the gold standard. Productive co-parenting focuses on collaboration and open communication for the child's benefit. It involves mutual respect and a shared commitment to prioritize their well-being. Example of productive co-parenting:
  • Both parents are informed about the child cutting class.
  • They discuss the incident and agree on a unified consequence.
  • They may even talk to the child together to explain their decision.
This approach allows children to see their parents working together and focusing on their needs, fostering a sense of stability.

Finding balance after a contentious divorce or separation

Co-parenting can be complex and emotionally challenging. In cases of disagreement over custody and parenting time, or parents who find it difficult or impossible to communicate, a knowledgeable child custody attorney can provide guidance and support, helping parents focus on a child-centered approach. A skilled lawyer can help create agreements that reflect the child’s best interests and help parents transition towards more productive co-parenting. In the end, the goal should be to ensure that your child feels loved, secure and valued by both parents, despite the changes in family dynamics.]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[What are challenges of divorcing a narcissist?]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47556 2025-01-30T20:20:55Z 2025-01-30T20:20:55Z Common traits of narcissists When you make your wishes for divorce known to a narcissistic spouse, it's crucial to understand their typical reactions. Narcissists often struggle with accepting rejection and may go to great lengths to maintain control. Here are some common characteristics you may encounter:
  • Refusal to accept responsibility for the marriage's breakdown
  • Attempts to manipulate you into staying
  • Aggressive or threatening behavior
  • Spreading false narratives about you to friends and family
  • Using children as pawns in the divorce process
  • Prolonging legal proceedings to maintain control
Recognizing these behaviors can help you prepare for the challenges ahead and develop strategies to protect yourself emotionally and legally during the divorce process.

You don't have to "go it alone"

Seeking support from close family and friends is crucial when cutting ties. Their support can help you stay strong and focused. Additionally, working with a skilled divorce lawyer who understands narcissistic personality traits is essential. While those close to you can provide emotional support, experienced attorneys focus on your legal needs. If you have children, the relationship with a narcissistic ex-spouse can be even more challenging. Your attorney can help craft straightforward custody arrangements prioritizing your children's well-being. When co-parenting with a narcissist, it's essential to establish clear boundaries, document all communications and maintain a consistent routine for your children. Remember to prioritize your children's emotional needs and shield them from any conflict between you and your ex-spouse.]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[Child custody terms and schedules: What you need to know]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47557 2025-01-20T20:36:33Z 2025-01-20T20:36:33Z child custody terms and custody schedules. Understanding the following terms can make these discussions more informed.

4 terms to learn when discussing child custody

There are four particularly important terms that may be useful to know when discussing child custody. These terms can help parents negotiate custody that best suits them and their child’s well-being. These four terms include:
  1. Legal custody: This kind of custody determines how much control parents have to decide what is best for their children. Parents with legal custody make decisions for their children, including how they receive their education, what type of medical care they receive or whether they are raised in a religious setting. Legal custody can greatly affect a child’s upbringing.
  2. Physical custody: This kind of custody determines where a child lives. Parents with physical custody may be responsible for providing for their child’s basic needs (clothing, food, shelter, etc.) and maintaining their daily routine (going to school or medical appointments).
  3. Joint custody: Parents can split legal and physical custody. This allows both parents to partake in their child’s life, raise their child daily, provide for their child’s needs and define their upbringing.
  4. Sole custody: A single parent may be given legal and physical custody. This parent may be entirely responsible for raising their child. The other parent may be given very few options to stay involved in their child’s life.
Whether parents work together or raise their child alone, parents may use these terms to help decide how they want to raise their children after a divorce.

Creating a custody schedule that fits your family’s needs

If parents share custody of their child, they may need to create a custody schedule. Custody schedules help parents maintain daily physical custody obligations. Parents can use custody schedules to rotate the days each parent spends with their children. A custody schedule may be split evenly so each parent spends the same amount of time with their children. For some families, a custody schedule may allow one parent to spend more time with their child than the other. Legal guidance can help parents explore their child custody options after a divorce. After all, every family’s needs and circumstances are unique.]]> by mdonskoi <![CDATA[Does It Really ‘End With Us’? Why The End Of An Abusive Relationship Is The Most Dangerous Time For The Survivor]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47558 2025-01-07T07:06:51Z 2025-01-07T07:06:51Z Does It Really ‘End With Us’? Why The End Of An Abusive Relationship Is The Most Dangerous Time For The Survivor]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[Financial Abuse Is Domestic Violence]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47546 2025-02-13T03:38:39Z 2024-11-26T03:37:31Z Financial Abuse Is Domestic Violence]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[Nesting And Child Custody: Is It Only For The Birds?]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47544 2025-02-13T03:37:15Z 2024-11-19T03:36:17Z Nesting And Child Custody: Is It Only For The Birds?]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[Drugs, Alcohol, And Child Custody: A Toxic And Deadly Mix]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47542 2025-02-13T03:35:57Z 2024-10-17T02:34:59Z Drugs, Alcohol, And Child Custody: A Toxic And Deadly Mix]]> On Behalf of Fersch LLC <![CDATA[Could Joseph Tacopina’s Cross-Examination Of E. Jean Carroll Officially Put An End To The Old Cross-Examination Tropes In Domestic Violence And Sexual Assault Cases?]]> https://www.pffamilylaw.com/?p=47540 2025-02-13T03:34:42Z 2024-09-06T02:33:35Z Could Joseph Tacopina’s Cross-Examination Of E. Jean Carroll Officially Put An End To The Old Cross-Examination Tropes In Domestic Violence And Sexual Assault Cases?]]>